Thursday, July 21, 2011

Crazy world, crazy me

I don't know what time it is, all I know is that I am alive. It's hard to understand what life wants from me, from us. Every time it throws something new and interesting it attaches a big baggage of burden, pain and sorrows with it. It has a very funny way of equating joys and sorrows. In the world we live, everything around us seems to be balanced by some or the other thing, there's sky to earth, fire to water, birth to death, hunger to food and love to hate but Life never seems to be balanced properly yet everyone believes it to be.

Everything around is so unexpected, unimaginable and so unpredictable. People say that's the thrill of life, that's what keeps a motion in us to keep moving. I wonder if that's the truth then why it all seems so complicated. I don't know if all this makes any sense or not but whatever it is, I am still alive and moving...

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Marriage - An imposed affair or a consented decision

They say pairs are made in Heaven but they meet here on Earth. How true this is, I can't say but whatever it is, I am glad that there are people who achieve what they fight for in their life with commitment and determination. I salute to all those who have accomplished their dreams after a desperate struggle. As such I know many people around me who have struggled in their life for what they wanted and have accomplished their dreams in one or the other way but one of my most favorite cases is of my own friend or I should say friends who fought against all adverse situations and came out bright and shinning. Their story is just like any other romantic fairy tale.

Once upon a time there was a handsome, charming, smart and intelligent Hindu Prince who had everything in his life but was still unhappy because he was missing a part of his heart. One fine day when prince charming was riding to his college he saw a cute beautiful Muslim Princess. For once in his life he felt as if he found the missing part of his heart and it was beating to conjoin with her for eternity. Say it a coincidence or destiny, both prince charming and princess magnificent were in the same classes and just in a short time became friends. Life went on day by day, they became good and then best friends and then they came close enough to feel their hearts pumping to each other’s beats. They were finally in love. Everything around was blooming in bright colors, birds were chirping and singing the love hymns, Gods were happy and the Devils envy. It was heaven on Earth. Then came the day when unexpected happened. Princess was forced to get engaged to a distant known person in her family against her will. Everything around that once looked like heaven turned into hell and once again the happy going love story took a notorious turn. Things changed from this point onward for everyone related to the Prince and the Princess. Friends supported in all possible ways, sometimes to bring them together and other times to help them understand that what is destined will happen no matter what they do and how much they try. Good luck was once again jinxed by the shadow of the dark wills. Nothing was going right at either ends, tragedies and sorrows surmounted day by day and then one day Princess surrendered to the situation and agreed to do what her family wanted. On the other hand, Prince’s heart was shattered in thousands of pieces and just like any other normal person; he too lost his hope in life. But he was not ready and prepared to face this. He was determined and ready to give one more shot for his life. Both of them knew that there was a very slim chance of turning things their way but they had hope, determination, love and faith in each other so they tried one more time to talk to their families face to face and explain them and try to convince them. There were rifts initially from the prince’s side but everyone knew that the happiness of a family lies in the happiness of each member and parents are happy if their kids are. The other side (princess family) had a different point of view. They were not quite ready to welcome this ideology; the whole thing about a Hindu boy for a Muslim girl was scary for the family. Despite numerous attempts by the couple, princess’s family denied and rejected the proposal. Time was definitely not favoring the couple and situations were becoming worse day by day. The wedding day was nearing for the princess and there seemed no hope at all for either of them.

Friends and relatives were supportive and ready for any adversity at Prince’s side but the question remained, was the Princess ready? After going through adverse situations and tormenting time, Prince had to do something to be sure if he will walk with the princess for the rest of his life or not. So he decided to take the biggest step of his life, to rescue the princess from the clutches of society and rules and get married without the permission of the society. But he didn’t meant to disconnect from family and society, he just wanted to get married and convince the families that what they did is not wrong and they both as a couple can live happy and keep families intact and happy too. But like any Bollywood (Indian movie industry) drama, this love story too had twists. Princess backed off after hearing the idea of running away and be unfaithful to her family, go against society rules and bring shame on her family’s name especially when the wedding was just in few days. Yet her heart was not ready to do what people, society and family wanted, she wanted to do what was right for her, what her heart wanted. She was struggling within to make a decision to marry the guy chosen by her family and live an imposed life or the guy she chose and loved and live a free life. After couple of days of intense thinking and determination, Princess finally made the decision of going with her heart but with an aim that no matter what happens in life, they both will prove to the world that there is nothing wrong in loving and living with the person you want to and love sees no boundaries, no religion, no caste, color or creed. Finally, the plan was put in place and prince charming managed to rescue his princess and escaped to an unknown destination where no one can trace them back. Friends played an important role in organizing the logistics and getting the couple married in safe and secured environment. On July 7th 2009, the couple got married and became lawfully husband and wife and returned to their home with a hope that in time they will bring back everyone and everything back to normal and live as a big happy family. Eventually, families from both sides understood them and welcomed them as a couple, as a son and as a daughter and conjoined hands in peace and harmony. And, as all love stories ends, this happy couple too embraced each other for the eternity vowing to stand side by side in all good and bad times by getting married twice after the legal marriage as per each religion’s custom and norms.

I wonder when Indian society will come out of the taboo and stigma of not building inter religion relationships and accepting the fact that a boy and a girl can choose their own life partners and need not be pushed to marry someone who is chosen by the family. People are mature enough now to make their decisions and families should stand by their side for support and guidance but not to push, force and impose decisions against the will of individuals. People would debate for countless hours that statistics show that failure of love marriages is higher than arranged marriage and I for one time will not debate on this because there is no definite answer to this. Tell me of one married couple which has no issues, no fights and no drifts of any sort. Even arranged marriages fail, doesn’t matter if the failure rate is high or low, fact is they also fail. It is not about arranged or love, it is about the understanding and compatibility between couple. At least in case of love marriage, couple cannot blame anyone but themselves, but in an arranged marriage the entire family is as involved as the couple. Different countries, different cultures, different mentalities and different point of views, and yet life continues in all situations and circumstances.

All in all, I just pray good life for everyone and a very Happy Anniversary to my friends who are enjoying their special day somewhere today with no regrets.